Tuesday, July 5, 2011

All i have is forever ......

So I have been out of the loop for a little bit. I know. And I also know that some may have not noticed, and some may have missed me. But I can honestly say I have missed you guys!!! I hope all is well with everyone. Alot had happened over the course of these past few weeks. Sickness, between me and my little man I think we have had every sickness we could possibly get. Death, a few deaths since my cousin passed. And Even though I have not had too much time to deal with his truly, all of this life happening aruond me I suppose is his way of telling me to not grieve. I did get "let go" of my job. Being out that week, yea that is what did it. They just had to get all the paperwork up to do it. They told me I could reapply in a month and I could have my job back. But I think I am going to enjoy my summer and go back to teaching. I also had someone in my life find time for me through his busy schedule. And although I know slow is the key, he makes me smile along with plenty of other things. I was waiting around to see if things were going to kick off. And now it seems as though waiting and space were what worked for him to come through with his feelings. I am just glad they match mine. :) However, I am as pessimistic as I have ever been about things. I am normally the optimist who always looks for the silver lining. But for me, compared to my normalcy, I am being a pessimist. maybe not to others standards though. I have been really tired lately. This heat is getting to me. And I hope to making a trip for the weekend to see a few people next weekend. And all I can hope is that part of the weekend includes water. Becasue GOODNESS it is hot. This Georgia girl cannot take it anymore. Me and my ex actually had a decent dinner about two weeks ago. We talked about alot of things. We got mad and sad and regretted things we said and then were very sincere in other things. We will make things work. As well as they can I suppose. I wish I could move. But I have too much going on here to move right now. You know it is crazy. I can fall asleep and think about so many things but they never get resolved. My dreams are so much like my life. Just want to live just a little more so I can see everything resolved. And not resolved by my death. But resolved to conclusion about the individual problem. I am trying to get healthier. Both physically and mentally.
I resigned from the play. I got super sick and then realized without any help, it was not possible to do it. It was not possible to spend every night in a play when me and my son need each other. I am happy with my choice. There will be other plays. 
Well this was a very short version of what I had planned on writing. But another one will come soon. Right now my little man is wanting to go play. And he needs his momma, his best friend. :) Life is great.

4 comments:

  1. Great to see you. (hugs) Missed you!

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  2. Sounds like you're at a turning point in your life and you're already heading in the right direction. Good luck to you, and remember you're your own worst enemy!

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  3. wow I am glad I came here to read this. I have got behind on reading blogs I have so many that I like. Hope you do get a job you like.

    hugs from alex ❤_✷

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